It’s a painful fact that sometimes, no matter how hard you try or how much time you spend working on something, what you make might suck. That is exactly what happened to me with the art doll I was making. I spent hours and hours on it and had such high hopes for how it would turn out. My hand is still sore from trying to stuff it successfully.
But in the end, sometimes it just doesn’t matter how hard you work on something or how much you want it to be awesome. Sometimes it will suck and you will have to let it go and move on.
This is a picture of my doll after I gave up adding more stuffing. I didn’t even bother to make the arms. At that point I knew I was done and it was over because it was ugly and not something I wanted to ever send out into the world. Its head was too small and its body too large and nothing really worked for me. The only thing I liked about it was the little blue rabbit I sewed on its leg. That’s it.
There are times when a piece comes together almost effortlessly on the first try. This was not one of them.
I originally planned on creating an abstract floral piece that consisted of a very detailed mixed media background, along with a vase and flowers. I worked for hours on the background and the vase come out just the way I wanted it to.
Unfortunately, the flowers did not. They were a disaster. The loose style I was trying to obtain never quite came together. I tried to fix the flowers, but I only ended up making them look even worse than they already did. I was at the point of no return.
As much as it killed me to do, I had to cover up everything with gesso and start from scratch. Hours and hours of work, now gone.
Next, I decided to go in a different direction and try some sketchy watercolor type florals. I just didn’t feel confident enough to try the same technique I had just failed at.
Unfortunately, I couldn’t get this right either. It was just not good. Although I was able to fix the flowers using stencils and acrylic paints, the leaves and stems were still awful. I was thinking that I was going to have to start all over once again.
It was then that I remembered a vine stencil I had. I pulled it out and decided to give it one last shot. I’m glad I did because that stencil allowed me to save the piece.
I don’t think this will ever be one of my favorite creations, but I’m glad that I didn’t quit and that I was able to step back and take a moment and figure out a new direction.
Wouldn’t it be great if we were able to do this in our personal lives as well? Sometimes, when things aren’t working out the way they should, whether it be a job, a relationship, a personal goal, etc., we tend to become emotional and just walk away. We quit, we abandon, we sabotage.
I know I have done that so many times over the course of my life. I felt that it was easier to just walk away instead of digging in and doing the work that might have salvaged something and perhaps taken my life in a new direction.
I’m not saying that we should stay in toxic or abusive relationship. That is never the case. But I am saying that perhaps a friendship could be saved or deepened or a relationship with a child could be turned around if we just took a step back, took a deep breath and figured out what we need to do next instead of walking away.
So today, I’m going to choose to hang in there and do something difficult instead of giving up and walking away. I know it won’t be easy, but I know it will be worth it in the end.
